Caregiving can be an isolating experience especially if your charge has difficulty fighting off illness for one reason or another. Even as the number of people around us increases, it may still not help the feelings of loneliness. After all, most of them are strangers. You can walk past hundreds of people in a mall, drive past hundreds more on the road, and still not have a single meaningful conversation.
4 Tips for Fitting in Time for Your Partner
It’s a neverending battle. You work your butt off from the moment you wake up until the moment your child goes to bed, and then at least a little bit more afterward. The laundry is done (or, at least clean…), something to eat for dinner has been provided (thank you slow cooker), and now you’re thinking longingly of your bed. Yes, bed, that unattainable paradise where you may get a few hours rest before cries for your attention ring through the house at some hour of the morning which allows for less, and sometimes significantly less, than eight hours of sleep.
Where could time for your partner ever fit in? There aren’t enough hours in the day to get everything done as it is. I propose you don’t do chores while your spouse is awake and home. That’s right, if it takes more than a minute or two, then just skip it. For example, switch laundry over but don’t fold it (if you ever had time to fold it in the first place). Cook in the slow cooker instead of slaving over the stove (or microwave). Clean up that puddle of vomit on the floor, but don’t break out the carpet cleaner because you see several other spots just like it scattered across the room.
Congratulations to the Winners!
Congratulations to Alesha, Meg, Kyle, Jan, Robert, Debbie, Veda, Rosa, Brittany, and Kelley!
The signed copies of Becoming a Medical Mom were mailed today. If you’re interested in obtaining your tracking number, contact me via my website or Goodreads and I’ll gladly give it to you. They were mailed U.S.P.S. First Class so they should arrive in 2-5 days.
Please don’t forget to leave a review, especially if you like the book! Reviews, on amazon.com especially, are critical to the success of a book.
Medical Identification (Medical ID)
I highly recommend anyone with a child who has complex medical issues or special needs purchase a basic medical ID. There are a lot of different kinds available. There are adjustable ones with velcro and watch bands. For the fashion forward there are adorable combinations of pink and blue bracelets. You can choose to engrave the details on a plate. Some have a pocket where there’s a little piece of paper you write on. Whatever method you choose, children with special needs and complex medical issues NEED a Medical ID.
Why? You might be incapacitated by the same thing that injured your child or your child might not be with you. Then…
- Drug allergies will not be discovered until the drug is administered.
- If your child has an implanted device, such as a shunt, no one will know to check right away if it’s been damaged.
- They may offer your child who silently aspirates food or drink.
Last Day of Goodreads Giveaway
If you haven’t already heard, I’m giving away 10 free signed copies of my book Becoming a Medical Mom on Goodreads.
https://www.goodreads.com/giveaway/show/160173-becoming-a-medical-mom
It has 3 five star reviews, 2 on Goodreads and 1 on Amazon.com. It’s an excellent resource for parents of kids who have medical needs (and I’m not the only one that thinks so)!
Three Ways to Lift Your Spirits
This Thanksgiving was hard on so many. A lot of the people I know had a wonderful thanksgiving. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving. However, not everyone was so fortunate. Some of my fellow Moms spent Thanksgiving in the hospital away from their other children and their families. Others were left out because someone assumed they didn’t want to do something because of their child’s medical history. Still more were pulled into drama-filled situations for which they didn’t have the emotional strength to spare.
I’m Thankful For…
Today I’m thankful for:
- All of the progress my son has made with his therapy. He’s gone from not being able to hold his head up until 9 months to walking at 20 months!
- Having the financial resources and enough health insurance to enable us to afford our son’s medical care.
- Everyone who has supported me along the way. Friends, both near and far. Parents, Grandparents, Sisters, and other family members too numerous to mention.
- The patience and strength to handle the last seventeen months.
- My readers who, at the end of the day, make my writing more than just a few notes on a website or piece of paper. You are what make my thoughts and feelings come alive again after they’ve been written.
Thank you!
The Nearly Impossible Task of Finding a Sitter
Finding someone to babysit for a few hours is both the easiest and the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. Whenever I mention to a friend or co-worker I need a babysitter they know a million and a half people who would LOVE the job. The excitement is palpable. They’ve clearly convinced themselves they know a 13-year-old whose minimally responsible enough to make sure a younger child in their care makes it through being babysat without a trip to the emergency room.
A Special Bond
Mothers frequently have a unique bond with their children. Something about being “Mom,” or “Dad” where he’s the primary caregiver, creates a connection with your child which cannot be broken. Mothers who adopt have it as well, as does anyone who serves as a child’s primary caregiver. The unbreakable tie between you and your child becomes stronger when your child has medical difficulties or special needs.
It’s not that these caregivers love their children any more than anyone else. It’s a strengthening which increases the sensitivity of both Mom and the child to the connection itself. It’s as if you can feel your child’s presence through a sixth sense. Their emotions are as clear as day. Personally, I frequently become tired when my son gets tired even if he shows no outward signs of fatigue. If I take a nap while he’s sleeping, I wake up around the same time he does.
4 Ways to Encourage Independence
Children with medical needs or other special needs are heavily reliant on their caregiver in many cases. In the majority of situations, this is out of necessity and not preference. Most parents would love their children to be able to play on their own for a little while so they can take care of household chores, make phone calls, and take care of other tasks. I’ll share a few ways myself and other Moms I know have increased their child’s independence. I hope they work for you as well!
Struggling to Thrive 